Queer Dictionary

An individual whose sexuality is fluid. While a person's sexual identity can shift in some way throughout their life, an abrosexual person's sexuality may change more frequently, over the course of hours, days, months, or years. It is often considered to be the sexuality equivalent of genderfluid and part of the asexual spectrum.

The timing of the fluctuations is different for every person; for some the fluctuations may be erratic and for others they may be regular. The sexualities that a person fluctuates between also varies. Some abrosexual people may be fluid between all sexualities, while others may only be fluid between a few.

A disconnection between oneself and a sexual partner/object of arousal; may involve sexual fantasies, or arousal in response to erotica or pornography, but lacking any desire to be a participant in the sexual activities.

Aegosexual (formally known as Autochorissexual) is a sexual orientation found within the asexual umbrella. It was coined by Anthony Bogaert in 2012. He used the term "autochorissexual", however, the community feels that this term pathologizes the identity.

Someone who experiences sexual attraction.

A sexual orientation label referencing asexuality. Sometimes called the "Ace Umbrella" to represent the wide spectrum of asexual identities and experiences.

A person who experiences sexual attraction but does NOT want it reciprocated under ANY circumstances. Also known as Lithosexual,

Someone under the Asexual umbrella who is sex repulsed. some apothisexuals, they are averse to the idea of engaging in sex themselves, but are fine with sexual activity that does not involve them. Others may be repulsed by the idea of sex in general. Those who are apothisexual typically do not seek out sexual relationships.

Experiencing little or no romantic attraction to others and/or has a lack of interest in romantic relationships/behavior. Aromanticism exists on a continuum from people who experience no romantic attraction or have any desire for romantic activities, to those who experience low levels, or romantic attraction only under specific conditions, and many of these different places on the continuum have their own identity labels.

A sexual orientation that refers to a person who experiences little or no sexual attraction and who chooses to call themselves asexual.

Asexuality exists on a continuum from people who experience no attraction or desire for sexual activities, to those who experience low levels, or only under specific conditions will they experience sexual attractions.

Ace is a common term used by individuals to refer to themselves as on identity that falls within asexuality.

A curiosity about having attraction to people of the same gender/sex (similar to questioning).

A person who has the capacity to have physical, romantic, and/or emotional attractions to those of the same gender, or to those of another gender.

A bisexual identity does not necessarily equate to equal sexual attraction to only two sexes; commonly, people who have a distinct but not exclusive sexual preference for one sex over the other also identify themselves as bisexual.

A process of revealing more openly to self or others one’s LGBTQ identity.

The process by which one shares one’s sexuality or gender identity with others (to “come out” to friends, etc.).

It’s entirely your choice whether or not you come out, and who to. Some people find they prefer not to come out. Others find it makes them a positive role model to others and feel glad that they did.

Someone who is sexually exclusively attracted to the same sex, but is willing to participate in sexual activities with other genders/sexes (despite no sexual attraction for them).

A person who does not exhibit sexual attraction towards anyone under any circumstances, but is willing to engage in sex or sex like activities with others and/or have sexual relationships with someone.

A person who requires an emotional connection with someone before feeling any type of sexual attraction.

Demisexuals will often know someone and have developed a romantic relationship before engaging in any type of sexual activity.

An asexual spectrum identity. The person has sexual interest, but none of it involve direct penetration. Rather, they prefer outer course (sexual activities that do not involve penetration), or sensual actions.

A sexual orientation referring to a male person whose primary attraction is to other male folks

Someone who typically does not experience sexual attraction but from time to time will be attracted to another person.

This term falls under the Asexual (Ace) Umbrella, This is a catch term for anyone who falls in the 'grey' area between sexual and asexual, this term has also been used for those who fall under the aromantic spectrum.

The assumption that everyone is heterosexual and that heterosexuality is superior and preferable. The result is discrimination against bisexual, lesbian and gay people that is less overt, and which may be unintentional and unrecognized by the person or organization responsible for the discrimination.

A person who has romantic or sexual attractions only to people of another gender.

Negative attitudes, feelings, or irrational aversion to, fear or hatred of gay, lesbian, or bisexual people and communities, or of behaviours stereotyped as “homosexual.” It is used to signify a hostile psychological state leading to discrimination, harassment or violence against gay, lesbian or bisexual people.

A person who is sexually attracted to members of the same sex. Male homosexuals are usually referred to as gays, and females as lesbians.

A woman who is emotionally, physically, spiritually and/or sexually attracted to women.

Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, Transgender, Two-Spirit, Queer, Questioning, Intersex, Asexual, Agender, Pansexual

A man who has sex with men. This term is used to include men who engage in homosexual behaviour but do not identify as gay.

Non Binary, is a catch-all category for gender identities that are not exclusively masculine or feminine‍—‌identities which are outside the gender binary and cisnormativity. Non Binary people may express a combination of masculinity and femininity, or neither, in their gender expression.

A person who has romantic or sexual attractions to people of any gender identity (both binary and non-binary).

The practice, state or ability of having more than one sexual loving relationship at the same time, with the full knowledge and consent of all partners involved.

An umbrella term used proudly by some people to identify themselves as members of the lesbian, gay, bi, and/or trans communities or cultures.

Occasionally used by someone who wishes to defy gender or sexual restrictions.

Queerplatonic or quasiplatonic relationship, (QPR)  is a term used to describe a relationship that is intimate but not sexual. Some have defined it as a cross between a best-friendship and a romantic relationship. Often used by the Asexual community.

A period where a person explores their own sexual and/or gender identity, reflecting on such things as upbringing, expectations from others, and inner landscape. The person may not be certain if s/he is gay, lesbian, bisexual, or trans and may be trying to figure out how to identify themselves.

An attitude that embraces a diversity of forms of consensual human sexuality, and advocates for sex education and safer sex.

Sexual identity as the label that people adopt to signify to others who they are as a sexual being, particularly regarding sexual orientation Most often people have a sexual identity that is the same as their sexual orientation e.g. most heterosexual people identify as straight and most homosexual people identify as 'lesbian' or 'gay'. However there is a large number of people for who their sexual orientation does not match their sexual identity. For some there is a political element to this for e.g. identifying as queer to highlight the fluidity and diversity of gender and sexual orientation.

Toward whom a person’s sexual desires and drives are oriented – toward only women, or only men, or nobody, or irrespective of gender. It is separate and independent from a person’s gender identity. It can be fluid over time. The identity a person uses to describe their sexual orientation may not reflect their sexual behaviours.

A woman who has sex with women.

AFAB (FAAB): Assigned Female at Birth - Refers to birth assignment, not one’s gender identity. Assigned Female at Birth refers to how babies are assigned a gender (male, female or intersex) based on anatomical characteristics at the time of their birth.

A person with no (or very little) connection to the traditional system of gender, no personal alignment with the concepts of either man or woman, and/or someone who sees themselves as existing without gender. Can also refer to a person whose gender identity is genderless or neutral

Assigned Male at Birth - Refers to birth assignment, not one’s gender identity. Assigned Male/Female at Birth refers to how babies are assigned a gender (male, female or intersex) based on anatomical characteristics at the time of their birth.

A gender expression that has elements of both masculinity and femininity; also occasionally used in place of “intersex” to describe a person with both female and male anatomy.

Used to describe people whose gender identity is in harmony with the sex assigned to them at birth.

A system of oppression that considers cis people to be superior to trans people. It includes harmful beliefs that it is “natural” to be cis and “aberrant” to be trans. Examples include scrutinizing the genders of trans people to more than those of cis people or defining beauty based on how cis people look.

A person who, for various reasons, wears gender atypical clothing or occasionally dresses in clothing of the “opposite” gender. They may or may not self-identify as a cross dresser. Cross-dressers don’t associate with the LGBTQ community and don’t see themselves as anything but straight/heterosexual.  

Someone who dresses in the clothing of the “opposite” gender for performance. Drag performers can be of any gender identity or sexual orientation but are typically queer. It is usually polite to refer to a drag queen as "she" when she is in drag, and "he" when he is not and vice versa for the drag kings.

Gender refers to the socially constructed characteristics of women and men – such as norms, roles and relationships of and between groups of women and men. It varies from society to society and can be changed.

This is the classification of sex and gender into two distinct and disconnected states of masculine and feminine. It discourages people from crossing or mixing gender roles, and from identifying with more than two forms of gender expression. Sometimes in this binary model, "sex", "gender" and "sexuality" are assumed by default to align. For example, when a male is born, gender binarism assumes the male will be masculine in appearance, character traits, and behavior, including having a heterosexual attraction to females.

A state of emotional distress caused by how someone's body or the gender they were assigned at birth conflicts with their gender identity. It is a widely recognized medical condition. If untreated, it can lead to severe mental health issues, including debilitating depression, anxiety, and suicidal ideation; A term used in psychiatry to refer to the incongruence between an individual’s designated birth sex and their gender identity, with marked dissociation from one’s physical body.

How a person publicly presents or expresses their gender including behaviour and outward appearance such as dress, hair, make-up, body language, voice, chosen name and pronoun.

Each person’s internal and individual experience of gender. It is a person’s sense of being a woman, a man, both, neither or anywhere on the gender spectrum. This sense of self is separate from biological sex assigned at birth and is not related to sexual orientation. Since gender identity is internal, it is not necessarily visible to others.

Alternate pronouns that are gender neutral and used by some trans* people. They replace “he” and “she” and “his” and “hers” respectively. Alternatively some people who are not comfortable/do not embrace he/she use the plural pronoun “they/their” as a gender neutral singular pronoun.

Commonly used gender neutral pronoun usage:

Ze (or zie) and hir  -   Usage:   Ze laughed    I called hir    Hir eyes gleam    That is hirs    Ze likes hirself

Ze (or zie) and zir    - Usage:   Ze laughed    I called zir    Zir eyes gleam    That is zirs    Ze likes zirself

Xe   -                           Usage:   Xe laughed    I called xem    Xyr eyes gleam    That is xyrs    Xe likes xemself

The oppressive culturally and historically specific expectations and restrictions that are placed on a person based on whether they are medically categorized at birth as male or female.

denoting or relating to a person who does not identify themselves as having a fixed gender. They may move back and forth between gender presentations and identifications, or participate in queering of gender by mixing masculine and feminine presentations

This is an identity built around playing with stereotypical gender cues to purposely confuse, or combine a culture’s standard or gender expressions. A person who identifies as genderfuck may wish to remain separate from gender, or may play with the idea of gender.

An identity in which people feel that the very substance of their gender lies outside the binary of “male” and “female.” They reject the gender expectations and stereotypes for their birth assigned sex. They may identify and express themselves as “feminine men” or “masculine women” or as androgynous, outside of the categories of “boy/man” or “girl/woman” They may or may not identify as trans, and may use gender neutral pronouns such as ze, hir, hirs, they and them.

Intersex people are born with sex characteristics (including genitals, gonads and chromosome patterns) that do not fit typical binary notions of male or female bodies. Some intersex persons may be assigned and raised as a girl or boy but then identify with another gender later in life, while most continue to identify with their assigned sex.

The hatred and denigration of men and characteristics deemed masculine.

The hatred and denigration of women and characteristics deemed feminine.

Non Binary, is a catch-all category for gender identities that are not exclusively masculine or feminine‍—‌identities which are outside the gender binary and cisnormativity. Non Binary people may express a combination of masculinity and femininity, or neither, in their gender expression.

Passing applies to a transgender individual who is generally perceived as cisgender. Typically, passing involves a mixture of physical gender cues (for example, hair style or clothing) as well as certain behavioral attributes that tend to be culturally associated with a particular gender.

The term 'reading' is used to refer to the process someone uses to try to identify someone as transgender. This is also known as 'clocking'.

The medical classification of people as male, female or intersex, usually assigned at birth based on the appearance of a person’s anatomy. Sex characteristics include chromosomes, hormones, secondary sex characteristics, and other aspects of the body.

used by some medical professionals to refer to a group of surgical options that alter a person’s biological sex. “Gender confirmation surgery” is considered by many to be a more affirming term. In most cases, one or multiple surgeries are required to achieve legal recognition of gender variance. Some refer to different surgical procedures as “top” surgery and “bottom” surgery to discuss what type of surgery they are having without having to be more explicit.

Stealth is a term used for trans people who 'pass' as their desired gender at all times and no one around them has knowledge of their gender history.

Folks who go stealth also tend to have removed all contacts and connections to their gender history.

TERF is an acronym for Trans-Exclusionary Radical Feminist.  Their position denies that trans people's self-affirmed genders and sexes are equally valid as cis-people's self-affirmed genders and sexes. It has a decades-long history of allying with anti-feminist causes in denying trans people access to health care, and other human rights.

An umbrella term used for people whose gender identity is not in harmony with their birth assignment, either wholly or partially, or who experience their gender identity as radically different from what is expected of a "man" or "woman." It includes but is not limited to people who identify as transgender, trans woman, trans man, transsexual, gender non-conforming, gender variant or gender queer. There are many communities that live under this umbrella and there is no single or universal experience of what it means to be trans.

A female-to-male trans person.

A male-to-female trans person.

A host of activities that some trans people may pursue to affirm their gender identity. This may include changes to their name, sex designation, dress, the use of specific pronouns, and possibly medically supportive treatments such as hormone therapy, sex-reassignment surgery or other procedures. There is no checklist or average time for a transition process, and no universal goal or endpoint. Each person decides what will meet their needs.

Negative attitudes, expressed through cultural hate, individual and state violence, and discrimination directed toward trans women, and trans and gender non-conforming people on the feminine end of the gender spectrum.

Transmisogyny is all about the hatred of the feminine, and it is not limited toward only those who identify as women. It includes transfeminine and feminine-identified genderqueer people, as well as many others who are feminine-of-center but were not assigned female at birth.

An irrational negative response to transgender and intersex people, as well as other forms of gender-bending and gender non-conformity. People who have been taught to fear, hate or otherwise feel superior to people who are trans.

A cultural and spiritual identity used by some First Nations peoples to describe having both masculine and feminine spirits.  For some, Two-Spirit describes a societal and spiritual role that people played within traditional societies, as mediators, keepers of certain ceremonies, transcending accepted roles of men and women, and filling a role as an established middle gender.

The term is a translation of the Anishinaabemowin term niizh manidoowag, two spirits. The use of these terms by people who are not descendants of the First Nations is considered cultural appropriation.

A sexual orientation label referencing asexuality. Sometimes called the "Ace Umbrella" to represent the wide spectrum of asexual identities and experiences.

Bear is LGBT slang for those in the bear communities, a subculture in the gay/bisexual male communities and an emerging subset of LGBT communities with events, codes and culture-specific identity. It also describes a physical type.

Bears tend to have hairy bodies and facial hair; some are heavy-set; some project an image of working-class masculinity in their grooming and appearance, though none of these are requirements or unique indicators. Some bears place importance on presenting a hyper-masculine image and may shun interaction with, and even disdain, men who exhibit effeminacy. The bear concept can function as an identity, an affiliation, and an ideal to live up to, and there is ongoing debate in bear communities about what constitutes a bear.

(Also known as chest-binding). Binding is a technique used to minimize the appearance of a person's breasts. Some transgender men or gender-nonconforming individuals use binders (compression undergarments that look like spandex-y T-shirts) to bind the breasts to the body, creating a flatter chest.

A lesbian who exhibits a stereotypically masculine appearance or behaviour. It can also be used to denote an individual, or the dominant role in a lesbian relationship.  

The term butch originated in communities of lesbian and bi women, in which more masculine butches typically partnered with more feminine femmes. Because of this, butches are often assumed to be attracted to be sexually attracted to femmes, although this is not always the case. Butch women tend to follow a code of behaviour which has strong elements of traditional chivalry.

Butch women can present themselves and define "butchness" in a variety of ways. For example, being butch is about traditional masculinity to some butches, while it is about a whole new category of gender to others.

A process of revealing more openly to self or others one’s LGBTQ identity.

The process by which one shares one’s sexuality or gender identity with others (to “come out” to friends, etc.).

It’s entirely your choice whether or not you come out, and who to. Some people find they prefer not to come out. Others find it makes them a positive role model to others and feel glad that they did.

A bear in the making. Cubs are smaller and younger than their Bear counterparts.

Slang for lesbian. Usually used by younger members of the lesbian community.

Often used to refer to a feminine-presenting queer woman. Femmes are often not "read" as lesbians or queer unless they are with a butch partner, because they conform to traditional standards of femininity.

Also known as the “handkerchief or hanky code” Originated in the 1970’s. Individuals who participated in this form of flagging placed differently colored handkerchiefs in the back pockets of their pants: the left side for dominant sexual partners (tops) and the right side for submissive sexual partners (bottoms). The color provided even more detailed information about the wearer’s sexual preferences.

Femmes sometimes participate with “Femme-flagging manicures” where the colours parallel the hanky code.

This is an identity built around playing with stereotypical gender cues to purposely confuse, or combine a culture’s standard or gender expressions. A person who identifies as genderfuck may wish to remain separate from gender, or may play with the idea of gender.

Usually refers to a lesbian with a more overtly feminine gender expression. Can be used in a positive or a derogatory way. It is also used to refer to femmes who are attracted to other femmes.

The acronym for Marginalized Orientations, Gender identities, And Intersex.

Marginalized Orientations are orientations that aren't the default. For instance, someone whose sexual orientation is not heterosexual, or someone whose romantic orientation is not heteroromantic.

Gender Alignment, means that someone's birth assignment didn't align with the person's actual gender.

Intersex means someone who doesn't fit the norm of what society considers a "male body" or a "female body", without requiring any sort of treatment or surgery

it’s meant to be an all inclusive umbrella term for asexuals, homosexuals, trans people, and intersex people. It is used as an alternative to LGBT2Q+

An abbreviation referring to an HIV positive person. It is a term embraced by those who are HIV positive, particularly common in the gay community.

A period where a person explores their own sexual and/or gender identity, reflecting on such things as upbringing, expectations from others, and inner landscape. The person may not be certain if s/he is gay, lesbian, bisexual, or trans and may be trying to figure out how to identify themselves.

A person who may or may not desire sexual penetration and/or contact with the genitals or breasts. Stone Butches/Femmes still provide their partners with sexual gratification, and often experience pleasure themselves in doing so. A Stone butch/femme is also receptive to receiving sexual pleasure from her partner in different ways as well.

Passing applies to a transgender individual who is generally perceived as cisgender. Typically, passing involves a mixture of physical gender cues (for example, hair style or clothing) as well as certain behavioral attributes that tend to be culturally associated with a particular gender.

The term 'reading' is used to refer to the process someone uses to try to identify someone as transgender. This is also known as 'clocking'.

Stealth is a term used for trans people who 'pass' as their desired gender at all times and no one around them has knowledge of their gender history.

Folks who go stealth also tend to have removed all contacts and connections to their gender history.